16, 2:18 PM PST
Lindows Changes Name to Licrosoft to Avoid
SAN DIEGO -- Only a week after renaming its Linux-based
operating system from "LindowsOS" to "Linspire,"
the company has changed its corporate name from "Lindows,
Inc." to "Licrosoft."
"It was apparent to everyone that
Microsoft didn't intend to stop at our operating system's name,"
stated Licrosoft CEO Michael Robertson. "After all, Lindows
is Lindows is Lindows. So we took steps to avoid future litigation
by renaming the company."
Throughout out Licrosoft's history,
attorneys for Microsoft had doggedly pursued the company in court,
alleging "Lindows" infringed upon its own "Windows"
When U.S. courts refused to uphold
Microsoft's claim, the company filed trademark-infringement suits
throughout the world and appeared to be making headway in retarded
countries like Finland.
"Dude, man, we freakin'
killed them in the Netherlands," Microsoft attorney Dorian
Ludvard explained. "And Estonia was next -- everyone knows
what Estonia's like. Anyway, Licrosoft did the right thing and
backed down, even if it totally makes them look like complete
Ludvard was confident that Microsoft's
victory would serve as a lesson to those thinking about copying
Microsoft's intellectual property. "No one wants to be like
Licrosoft -- stalked, humiliated and receive threatening but
anonymous phone calls in the middle of the night. It's embarrassing,
"Hey, what's done is done,"
Robertson said, shrugging. "Sure, Microsoft won the battle
-- but we think that our new name not only stands out, but improves
upon our reputation as the leading provider of Linux-based operating
systems and software."
This fall, Licrosoft will launch
its new OS -- codenamed "Norhgnol" -- with a huge publicity
effort featuring the slogan "Where do want to be right now?"
and a widely-anticipated appearance by Keith Richards.
(no registration required)
The New News
| No Apologies! Press
Copyright © 2004, No Apologies!
The New News:
Satire for the Unwashed Masses