CREEPY CALIFORNIA CRISIS

Thursday, September 25, 4:31 PM PST

Schwarzenegger Keeps Yelling "Cut!" During Debate

by Brent the Johnson,
NA!P NewsWire

SACRAMENTO, CALIF. -- The Golden State's long-anticipated debate among all the major recall candidates finally took place last night, featuring the elusive Arnold Schwarzenegger, who had not participated in any of the other debates and has no plans to participate in any of the rest.

However, critics of the debate worried over the "scripted" aspect of the debate, as each candidate was given a copy of the questions to be asked beforehand.

First thought to provide Schwarzenegger with an advantage due to his Hollyfood background, it soon became apparent that the one-time Mr. Olympia didn't have a knack for live TV, especially when confronted with a woman of intelligence.

Following are select transcripts of the debate before it was edited for California voters:

SCHWARZENEGGER: Arianna, let me say one thing. Your personal income tax has the biggest loophole -- I can drive my Hummers through it. That's how big your loophole is. Let me tell you something.

HUFFINGTON: We got advanced notice in the New York Times that you're going to say that.

SCHWARZENEGGER: CUT!

HUFFINGTON: And you know very well that I pay $115,000 in property taxes and payroll tax. And you know what? I'm a writer. In these two years, I was writing and researching a book and I wasn't making $20 million violent movies.

SCHWARZENEGGER: I SAID CUT!

* * *

SCHWARZENEGGER: Arianna, we're talking about the car tax right now and not about education.

HUFFINGTOM: Let me finish, let me finish. You know, this is completely impolite and we know this is how you treat women and we know that, but not right now.

AUDIENCE: EWWWW...

SCHWARZENEGGER: CUT! Line, I need my line!

(Ten minutes later.)

SCHWARZENEGGER: I would like to say that I just realized that I have a perfect part for you in Terminator 4. That's it.

* * *

SCHWARZENEGGER: I'm providing the after-school programs, Cruz, and you know that.

HUFFINGTON: Hold on a second. Let me just counter that. You said that you were providing after-school care. You know, your crowning achievement, the passage of Proposition 49, has not provided after-school care for a single child in the state of California because there was no funding stream. It was nothing but a photo opportunity initiative. It was nothing but a springboard for your run for governor. ... Isn't it true that not a single child has gotten after-school care because of Prop. 49?

SCHWARZENEGGER: AARRRGHHaaGHHH! This is off script, this is not in the script! CUT CUT CUT!

* * *

HUFFINGTON: The day you decided to run you said you would never take any special interest money.

SCHWARZENEGGER: When you waited an hour-and-half to do a photo op with me? Was that the day?

HUFFINGTON: No, it was the day you were on the Jay Leno show.

SCHWARZENEGGER: Oh yeah. I mean... Nnnn-NYA-AYA-YA! I MUST KILL YOU!

HUFFINGTON: What did you say?

SCHWARZENEGGER: CCCUUUTTT! BY CROM, CUT!

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