Thursday,
September 21, 2000
Casper the Friendly
Ghost & the NBA Analogy: It Be a Sad Story, Yo
(Can't You Ghosties
Come Up With a Betta Argument Against Affirmative Action?)
Whitey a racist.
That ain't news
to my Brothas an' Sistas, yo. An' it ain't no kind of news to
you neither, Cracka. But you never do actually accept it, do
ya? Ya'll just shrug and say things like "It's a lot better
for you African Americans nowadays than it was in the Sixties."
Or y'all pull out
the "America freed the slaves!" line.
Or y'all shy away
from the past, yeah, an' go on an' on about how "America
is a classless society! Anyone can be anything he wants to be
if only he gives it the good Red-Blooded, Pink-Skinned try!"
Or "Skin color
doesn't mean anything. It's what you do, not what you are, that
counts."
An' you know what,
pinkbits? Them words, they's just fine until them words have
to be realio. Y'all like Casper the Friendly Ghost, yo -- friendly
enough on the outside, but cuz he a ghost, he ain't nothin' but
evil.
A ghost ain't got
no good qualities, an' that's a fact. But there be a couple reasons
why them bitches at Harvey --
the very same
fat lardy flabs who tried to make rich folk the "Good Guys"
with Richie Rich -- drewed that cartoon:
1) to add yet another
piece to the "Let's Muck Up Black Folks Head" Puzzle.
Casper distracts us from the fact that Whitey is the Pale Plague.
2) to justify to
young Whiteys 'bout the ways Whiteys act. It's like sayin' "Shit,
you is evil, but if you act real nice about it, you'll
fool 'em an' easy."
An' they almost
done it! Whole generations have a growed up thinking that crackas
can be "friendly." Cartoons are the White Devil's tool
that way -- theys can make y'all think that ghosts can be good.
They ain't. Just you ask my grandmama.
It's a simple formula,
yo:
Cracka
= Ghost = Evil
It don' take no
Einstein to figger it out. An' it don't take no Noam Chomsky
to unnerstand' the end result o' Casperification: The arisin'
o' the belief that Brothas can only be successful in the NBA.
Y'all think I'm
lyin', yo.
Casper was first
spawned during the midst of a white man's bowel-dumping in 1945.
A few years back, when y'all overthrew racial justice an' resumed
yo blood-guilt by destroyin' Affirmative Action, a whole slew
o' Crackas came out with commentaries an' books an' speeches
tellin' us why Affirmative Action was wrong. Well, theys din't
really tell us "why" -- most o' they's arguments come
down to this :
WHITE
DEVIL
Affirmative
Action is wrong!
BROTHA
How's that, you who once held
my ancestors in bondage, capped
my Daddy and raped my Momma?
WHITE
DEVIL
Well, because, uh... we
don't make you adjust
for Caucasians in the NBA!
BROTHA
Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit....
In otha wordz,
wigga -- y'all think me an' mine can't do nothin' but play us
basketball, that we ain't gonna succeed 'less we have Affirmative
Action doin' the job fo' us. An' all this is occuring just when
the full impact o' watchin' too much "Casper the Friendly
Ghost" over the course a three generations have caught up
with America, yo.
You think I'm lyin'.
But lyin' is the way of the Great White Father to the East. Take
this joker, a professor by name of Louis P. Pojoman, as an example:
"Consider
this analogy. Suppose that you were the owner of a National Basketball
Association team. Suppose that I and other frustrated White basketball
players bring a class-action suit against you and all the other
owners, claiming that you have subtly and systematically discriminate[d]
against White and Asian basketball players who make up less than
20% of the NBA players. When you respond to our charges that
you and your owners are just responding to individual merit,
we respond that the discrimination is a function of deep prejudice
against White athletes, especially basketball players, who are
discouraged in every way from competing on fair terms with Blacks
who dominate the NBA. You would probably wish that the matter
of unequal results was not brought up in the first place, but
once it has been, would you not be in your rights to defend yourself
by producing evidence, showing that average physiological differences
exist between Blacks and Whites and Asians, so that we should
not presume unjust discrimination?"
--
"The
Case Against Affirmative Action"
Louis
P. Pojoman,
Professor of Philosophy,
United States Military Academy
Y'all know what?
At this point, I don' even care none for the argument. You take
one side, I take another...
(Even though comparing
basketball and the races that comprise the NBA to the socio-economic-political
history of a nation which, in sum, has resulted in a preference
for Caucasian males in the job market or in the classroom is
just stoopid. But that's just me, yo -- me an' the facts.)
What's pissin'
me off is Whitey's thinkin' that Blacks can only dominate in
sports, namely basketball, specifically the National Basketball
Association.
Don't matter if
you's a stupid-ass professor like Louis P. Pojoman above, yo,
or if you just some stupid-ass white kid strugglin'
through English 101.
Through all ages, through all ranks, through all levels o' 'telligence
(or somethin' passin' for "intelligence"), any white
mothafucka tryin' to argue that they -- bein' fair an' all --
would neva accept racial preferences an' illustratin' their point
by using the Brotha's dominance o' the NBA is a racist.
They might not knowed it but they is (most o' them know, though).
In they's minds,
a Brotha can't do nothin' else but play sports anyway. In they's
minds, a Brotha ain't smart enough to do anythin' else properly.
In they's minds, a Brotha will never take their jobs away unless
Affirmative Action does it for them.
Well, fuck you
anyway. Affirmative Action was the closest Whitey ever came to
'fessin' up to they's centuries-old crimes 'gainst the minority
man. Affirmative Action was a recognition that Whitey, because
he himdelf have no color, already has advantages. Now
that y'all take Affirmative Action away, y'all just actin' like
you always did anyway: Take advantage o' yo owndelfs skins to
get a leg up on a Brotha like me an' mine.
So, any o' you
peaches who say Affirmative Action ain't fair eva come to Oaktown,
you send
me a message
yo, an' I'll takes you onna tour o' my dark alley. Yeah.
Now, I knows y'all
thinkin' "They's people who don't like affirmative action
and yet don't use the NBA Analogy!" An' maybe there is --
but more than a small percentage of commentaries, speeches and
books out there do use the analogy, and that's just bullshit.
Don' believe me? FUCK
YOU.
Me? I a thinkin'
"Casper the Friendly Ghost" has a lot to do with the
modern American Cracka's overt and subvert racism. That, and
they's hundreds of years of oppressin' the African.
Peace to the oppressed,
--
That Cavortin' Bastard